Where has the time gone? Has it really been a WHOLE MONTH today since I last blogged? I guess if the last post is dated August 16 and today is September 16, it must be true.
This post isn't really about cosmetics. I should do some swatches. I should write up a review or a tutorial. Heck, I probably HAVE pictures for a tutorial right now. But, I'm just too tired.
I wanted to let whoever is reading this know what I've been up to though and why I haven't been blogging.
In one word : Work!
I am there all the time. It's been really stressful for me lately but I feel like I'm learning lots. I won't give up! Matt is always there to support me as well as my best friend Shauna.
In two more words : Anxiety. Bipolar.
These are things I've never posted about on my blog because they are so far off topic but I think they are important parts that make up who I am and what I'm about. I've struggled with both these things for as long as I can remember, although it wasn't diagnosed until later. It's not something ashamed of. If it's something you've never had to deal with, it might seem crazy. Anxiety keeping me from blogging? "What if no one reads it? What if the people who do read it don't care?! What if they think I'm being stupid?! I AM BEING STUPID." *erases blog entry* When you couple that with the crippling depression of a "down" absolutely everything seems hard. So, when I disappear, that's usually where I've gone. Although, like I said. I don't think anyone really reads this!
Anyway, this past week I've been feeling a bit better. I had an interview for a 2nd job so I can pay off my loans faster. It was at Sephora and I had to do a live makeup demo! It was so nervous making having someone watching me do makeup with such a critical eye. I had a really easy going model though! She actually made me feel really comfortable and not anxious just by having a smile and believing in me even though she had no reason to care if I succeeded since we're not good friends and my getting a job doesn't affect her. She was still so supportive! :) LOOK! I did write something about cosmetics.
I promise there will be a tutorial soon! Although, you might need to expect more of these random life posts.
<3Catlady Cosmetician
Great entry! And I am in it! heh! I obviously relate to having anxiety. It is hard. It often keeps up from really living our lives. It's not easy but we should try and realize the majority of negative things we think aren't really our own thoughts, it's a lot of the time anxiety. At least that is what I think.
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